Fake Beaches

Everyone says to stay home during Semana Santa because the roads to get anywhere you'd like to go become like giant parking lots. I was thinking that maybe if we left and returned on an off-day, we could avoid the traffic, but who am I kidding? Ten million other people are thinking the same thing.

So our idea this year is to stay in Mexico City for the 4-day weekend but find a pool or rooftop terrace to enjoy the weather. Perhaps better than that, we can enjoy the city when everyone else is on vacation.

Alas, Mayor Ebrard had been thinking upon these very things, too. If you're too poor to afford a beach vacation in Cancun or Acapulco or you can't imagine spending one more second on the road but have a hankering for the beach, you might enjoy the city's artificial beaches at your municipal pool. That's right, sand, palm trees, and beach chairs right here in the city!

These playas artificiales aren't exactly the serene beach setting you dream about in your head, but how serene could the beaches be this time of year? Honestly, the scene at these artificial beaches looks a bit scary to me. It looks like the experience in the city, with everyone fighting for a small space, be that on the street, subway, or sidewalk. As much as I want to be on the beach this Semana Santa, I think we're going to let everyone else left in the city enjoy this Ebrardian "Vamos a la Playa" campaign.

Where to find the nine artificial beaches: La Alameda Norte (Azcapotzalco), Deportivo Vida Sana (Coyoacán), Balneario Popular San Juan de Aragón (Gustavo A. Madero), Ex balneario Olímpico (Iztacalco), El Centro Deportivo Casa Popular (La Magdalena Contreras), Bosque de Tláhuac (Tláhuac), Centro Deportivo Villa Olímpica (Tlalpan), Alameda Oriente (Venustiano Carranza), and Deportivo Emilio Sáenz Ibarra (Iztapalapa).

There are just so many things in this picture that frighten me.

Las Brisas Acapulco: A Second Honeymoon

Although Acapulco is just a short road trip away from Mexico City, we never hear very good things about it and stayed away. I was imagining the dingy -- gray and muddy water -- beaches of Galveston, Texas. And, for someone who loves just about any beach, Galveston is not one of them.

But, alas, with a few extra days to our weekend last week, we booked a last minute beach stay at Las Brisas Acapulco. Here are just a few of the unbelievable perks that made this stay like a second honeymoon:

• private casita
• private pool
• view of the Pacific Ocean
• breakfast brought to your doorstep via a "magic box" (imagine the old-timey milk doors)

Everything inside and out is tastefully pink and white, and short of Don and Betty Draper, you feel as though you've been dropped onto the set of Mad Men. Even the attendants walk around in white bermuda shorts and pink havana shirts.

While there was a lot of beautiful coastline and excellent restaurants to be taken in, I can't say we got further than our pool. One restaurant we did make it to was, as I call it, a weigh-and-slay where we picked our fish and had it grilled. It's called Beto Godoy, in the sleepy beach town of Barra Vieja, east of Acapulco. A must-go for the outdoor beach ambiance, though be prepared for slight price gouging.

Acapulco is definitely the most developed beach town we've visited here. And the development just seems to be beginning. There are brightly-lit, jumbo-sized supers, streets, highways, malls and condominiums developing in the east. Casa Palacio has even moved into town. But, whatever you might be looking for -- sleepy beaches, all-night parties, or private pools -- you can find something to your liking in Acapulco.