Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Letting Men be Men

Besides the safety issue, another issue that I realized I've become numb to while living in Mexico is the machismo attitude. The kind of manliness that drives many men here to whistle, honk their horns, yell crude pick-up lines, and even engage in 180 degree head turns when women -- particularly bust-a-licious or booty-licious women -- walk by. And, as amorous as couples seem here, there's a good chance that the man, while hugging and kissing his woman, has his eyes open, gazing at the other women walking by. To combat these machismo ways, I've learned to dress modestly, avoid eye contact, stare down at the pavement, walk quickly, and wear my iPod. But only when I'm alone; most men wouldn't dare say something when I'm with Nick. There are rules to this game, y'all...

Another machismo attitude that I find really disheartening is that many men here keep other women in addition to their wife/girlfriend (or, for lack of a better English word, their mujer). A security guard at Nick's work likes to brag about his women, that he can keep them all by "getting in and out quickly." When questioned about his wife, he replies "Ahh, no importa!" Or, my taxi driver de confianza that openly confesses to me about the many women he has despite having a mujer.

Cheating happens a lot, so much so that it's making me rethink the machismo attitude here in Mexico. Not so much the affairs, but the catcalling and such. As in, this open type of self-expression is very genuine. It's a very real and biological need that men have. Is it still annoying? Yes! Do I think there are better ways to meet one's needs? Definitely! But, I'm over the catcalling. Let men be men, and I'm just gonna keep on keepin' on with my frumpy clothes and anti-social street persona.


  1. Your so right about the men having more than one women. It is very common in Mexico. And I'm not always sure its only the men. The women just may not be as open about it. I think something that just helps all this out is that no one wears wedding rings. Out of all my Mexican married friends and most of my family, I have never seen a wedding ring on them. I know the ring symbolizes more than this but its also my way of saying hey I'm taken. And for me to know my husband is saying the same thing.

  2. Yeah, I don't see many rings on here. What does your husband say about this type of "polygamous affair" culture?

  3. Well thankfully he thinks its horrible. He has a friend who was cheating and he talked to him a lot about it and reminded him how important his wife and daughter are. Issac is thankfully a Christian who answers to God before me so he has a higher standard for our relationship than a lot and that can be said for living in the States to I do believe. But he also thankfully doesn't fall into the machismo crap. He cant stand it when guys do. Actually most of the guys he hangs out with are not that way, at least around me. Maybe that's more out of respect for Issac than it is that they are not like that I don't know. I am thankful that he has been able to be a good role model for the way a marriage is suppose to go for some of his younger cousins.